Papayas and Klondike Bars

Recently, I read that stress is spiritual isolation. I know that food anxiety is a form of stress that many people experience daily. Where does this anxiety over food start in a culture?

I have been fortunate to share many meals eating homemade Vietnamese food by my boyfriend's mother. His family and him came to the states 18 years ago, and she still prepares traditional meals from her country every night. They are flavorful and unique, and eating her cooking has helped me open up my taste buds from the american food i grew up on.

Tonight as i was over at his parent's house, we shared a fresh papya after dinner. As i sat there like a small child, waiting for it to be peeled and the seeds scraped out, i had flashbacks of our trip to Vietnam last summer. We spent 3 weeks in south Vietnam, and although the scenery and people were amazing, the tropical fruits were unforgetable. I woke up every morning eating pomelos and lychee. Every meal was followed by my favorite: dragonfruit. If you have never ate a dragonfruit, i highly encourage you to buy a ticket to a tropical country just to experience this great combination of kiwi and watermelon! And the apperance of the fruit is just badass, i mean who wouldn't want to eat something that looks like a hot pink ball of flames?

So as we enjoyed the fresh papaya, my boyfriend's father sat on the couch next to us and induldged in good old american Klondike bar! He looked just as satisfied with his dessert as i was with mine. But i did find it ironic that him and I were both enjoying food from the other's culture. I guess it demonstrates that everyone wants what they don't have or didn't have growing up. Im pretty sure he wasn't offered ice cream every week, like i was. I hardly saw ice cream or any dairy products for that matter while i was in Vietnam. On the other hand, i ate my very first papya at that same dinner table, just like i have tried a great deal of new tropical fruits and asian vegetables since moving to Seattle.

As i watched his father walk to the fridge and grab his second Klondike bar of the night, i realized that some cultures dont have a fear of food like Americans do. Some people are just glad to be living in a country where they have food on the table, whether it be a traditional meal or a savory american ice cream bar. Some people are excited to have a refridgerator even!

I think tonight i became aware that in order to rid our culture of food anxiety, we need to be humble and thankful for food in all its many forms. Although we can separate health food from the SAD: standard american diet, we can and need to also be thankful that we have food in this country and more imporant that we have choices and freedom to eat what our stomach desires.

The art of burger making

Last night i attempted to make garbanzo bean burgers that would be the perfect consistency for my mechanically altered diet for someone with dysphagia ( difficulty swallowing). At first, i thought it was going to take all the fun out of cooking, having to make food that forms a "bolus" in your mouth without chewing. In fact, i had a lot of fun, trying out both pan frying and broiling the patties to get a desired consistency. I felt like a scientist in the kitchen, experimenting with different temperatures, oils, and methods. But really, isnt that what all good cooks do? They experiment while they cook. I wish someone would have brought this up back in science class . . why dont they teach kids about food and science at the same time, instead of only talking about food in health class or home economics?



It does seem kinda ironic that although i have been studying science for both my undergraduate education and graduate program, learning to be a scientist in the kitchen is still frightening to me. I still cling to my recipes and try to follow every step. I know that one of the best ways to cook is through the senses, but i am still trying to remind myself that food is forgiving.

Just like our bodies.

I am also trying to step away from the having a scientific mindset about everything and instead learn through better use of my feelings. I feel that it is easy in my program to get consumed by the scientific knowledge about food and analyze it down to the last molecule. I also feel that my program is unique because it allows me to grow in my relationship with food emotionally and spiritually.

Therefore as with most things, the answer for me is to find a balance between the art and science of cooking. The art will evolve quietly, sometimes without my awareness, and this process requires trust and maybe burning a couple of burgers first!

Truthfully . . .

I have heard of new diets which are based upon trying to hide healthy food from children so that they will eat it. These disguised diet, do more harm than good. Why are we hiding good food? Why don’t we tell children whats in food? Where did it begin in history where we gave a piece of food to a child and said, "eat it, its good for you." Since when did we start treating children like they couldn't handle the truth. Children have so much more understanding then we give them credit for? I grew up with a great amount of love and attachment, but i also grew up with very little information about food. My mother cooked a lot, and i remember having to cook a meal for my family for my junior high home economics class, but other than that, i watched my mom cook. I never understood about what made a food whole versus what made a food processed. I never looked at an ingredient list and i didn't really understand where real food came from. But i knew that i loved eating my mom's meals, because they were satisfying and she took time to cook them. I could taste her intention to love through the use of food.



But what does education do for us? I keep thinking back to the ignorance is bliss statement. What we don't know wont hurt us. Now that I'm fully armed with education about food, am i really that much healthier? yes for sure, i have lost weight and my skin looks great, and how about my cravings . .they aren't for chocolate as much as they used to be. But am i happier? I couldn't tell you. I feel that my food choices are made off of what i learn in school, I'm still having trouble allowing myself to eat anything i crave.

SO i guess what I'm trying to say, is what if we teach children how to experience food for themselves, without just telling them to eat vegetables cause they are good for them? What if instead we taught them where food comes from and how farming can change the quality of food and then give them types of food to try and let them be the experts of their own bodies. That way they feel that they had the choice and let their body decide what was good and nutritious for them to eat.

Gut Lessons

Our bodies are forgiving.

I am realizing this more and more with each year that i live and put more food into my mouth. Our bodies can handle quite a bit in fact. There are some bodies that can go for 60 or 7o years on a diet of grease and saturated fat . .and never choose to rebel until then. Today i woke up and was amazed at this fact. Just the simple fact that our bodies can heal from the poor diets that we choose to feed it. And they can heal so beautifully and quickly, if we give them the proper nutrients. This thought came upon me, because i was thinking of how drastically different my diet is today from when i was growing up. I sometimes have to sit back and laugh at myself when i think of how many turkey sandwiches and spaghettio's i would eat. It was my favorite thing to eat after swim practice in the summer. Or how about good old McDonald's again . . .earlier i divulged my obsession with the sweet and sour sauce, but how do you think i got addicted to that stuff? Yep, i was a big fan of the chicken nuggets as well. I remember my sister and I fighting over who got to open up the 20 piece box first and choose which ones to devour.

So i never went hungry as a child, that's for certain. I was always happy and full. But now, I can't even stand the smell of fast food. And spaghettio's? Haven't touched the stuff since i was 12. But my body has been enjoying the whole grains, veggies, and beans i have been giving it, and the fruit . .i love the fruit. I just guess what I'm trying to say is that everyone has their memories of the food they grew up with and how yummy it was, but most people i know don't still eat like that. They tastes have changed or simply, the fact that they are now adults and have more control about who buys the groceries. But our bodies, they adapt from the poor diets we may have had as children and learn to run off of the food we choose to eat instead.

So the next time i do want to remember my days of spaghettio's or indulge in a little fast food. I should have no concerns that my body will handle the food just fine. It may not like it. It may grumble, it may rage as the sodium and high fructose corn syrup enter my stomach again. Or maybe it might say, " AH yes . . I remember this . . . .where have you been?"

You see, I'm pretty sure my body likes the food i give it now better. How do i know? Well i feel better, lighter, my skin is clearer, i lost weight, my blood pressure went down; stuff like that. But how do I really know if my body misses any of my old food obsessions that looking back, i think were so "BAD?" I guess that in writing this, i cant say for sure. What i do know, is that the body is adaptable and it will use whatever we feed it for fuel. It will make the best of the environments we choose to place it in. Our bodies will always try to find a balance for us to live in, regardless of what we may be supplying it with.

I think we all should marvel at that more. Or at least I'm going to, because i don't give my body enough credit for what it is capable of doing. And i certainly don't listen to its messages enough.

So who knew? Our own bodies can be the best teachers of adaptability and forgiveness. And all we have to do is listen and eat.

Doughgirl

Cookie Dough . .Raw cookie dough. Cold, sweet, sticky, sitting like a blob in my stomach, cookie dough. A little raw ball of my doughy childhood.

You see, i have had a love affair with cookie dough since i was old enough to peep over the kitchen counter. My mom, who bakes desserts in the best way imaginable, would tell me stories of how she would get in trouble by the nuns in Catholic school, for licking the bowl. Well i kinda have always looked up to my mom, and from that story on, i guess i decided to follow in her bowl licking steps. And so my affair began. I would stalk the cookie dough from the dining room table, watching my mom get out the flour, next, the whizz of the blender, then i would say to myself, "she'll be adding the chocolate chips anytime now." And then, off i went dashing into the kitchen, grabbing a spoon, or better yet rolling up my sleeves to dive into the fresh batch before all were rolled up and sent off to the mean oven. I didn't like the oven, it changed the dough. I have never been able to put my finger on it, but in the raw, something about that substance that no oven could ever recreate. Its as if the dough was perfect on its own. "Why do we ever have to make it into a cookie anyway," I would ask my mother. The only good answer she ever came up with had something to do with, "consuming raw eggs is hazardous . .blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah."

Well, I am living proof to to the rest of the world: raw cookie dough never hurt anyone! Well let me take a step back. Ah yes, my stomach reminds me of the fullness i have experienced after a few too many snatches of dough from my mothers' kitchen. Or the time my best friend from high school and I took a package of cookie dough in the car as we drove up and down the neighborhood streets looking at Christmas lights. Stuffing our faces in between the Ho Ho Ho's. Ah yes, now i remember that feeling of being a human doughgirl, but honestly besides a little discomfort, has anyone ever died from it?

Just recently i discovered something in the grocery store that i have been waiting to see for years. A pre-made, lovely package of natural cookie dough, and printed in small font on the side, i smiled as i read, " eating raw cookie dough doesn't make you sick." Finally! At last! Like-minded cookie dough enthusiasts who have come to save the day! Spreading the news to all hungry girls like me! But where were they all those cold winter nights trying to convince my mom that just another spoonful wouldn't put me over the edge?

I have thought about sending my mother a package in the mail. It would most certainly contain that cookie dough.

My love of cookie dough has followed me into my relationships with men, and most recently has shown me that i really do worship it. This became apparent one night, when i had a craving for cookie dough, but not just any cookie dough, the kind swirled in ice cream. Surprisingly though, when i crave cookie dough ice cream, i do a damn good job of making sure i pick out just the dough, and only the dough. There is something about that wet, just been immersed in cream dough that i love. Unfortunately, for my boyfriend, this means his stomach will be getting an entire gallon of plain vanilla ice cream. But seriously, what's a girl to do? Someone has to eat the vanilla ice cream that is plainly getting in the way of my the cookie dough! And that . .i have decided is true love. Girls, you know you have found, "the one," when between the both of you , an entire gallon of cookie dough ice cream is consumed, and you got to eat the best part: the raw dough. Yep, he's a keeper.

Even to this day, on one of the weekends i head back home to visit my parents, i can always be sure of two things. That my mom will make me my choice of cookie dough before heading back on the long, boring drive to Seattle. And that with each trip, she lets me sneak a little more dough than before. Maybe its a sign of maturity. Like she is silently saying, " I trust you. Eat all the dough you want, because by the time you make it home to Seattle, I'll be too far away to do anything about your bellyache. "But honestly i think that's what it is all about. The dough, sitting in my belly; my mother's love from afar.

Raising Healthy Eaters

In my last blog, i touched on the idea that so many people have ideas on how to raise healthy eaters. I think it is obvious why this area of nutrition is exploding, because of the rise in childhood obesity in America. Parents are afraid that their children will become fat and have to deal with all the implications of being obese. But is this better than raising children who are fearful of food and learn to call one certain food "good" or "bad"? I have alot of firsthand experience with this topic, because i struggled with my weight throughout elementary school, highschool and college. When i was born, i weighed 10 lbs 2 oz, so i guess i entered the world a lot larger than most babies! It wasnt until I came to Bastyr Univeristy for my graduate degree and learned about food and started to eat a variety of food and of course our well-loved whole foods diet that we promote. I am a great example of how education about food can impact a person's health. I am also a great example that just because someone is overweight as a child, doesnt mean they can't grow up to be a healthy adult. I reversed my high blood pressure as well. What this means to me, is that parents should be less concerned that their children's waistlines are growing and more concerned that their knowlege about food is growing smaller and smaller each day. Education surrounding food will always be available, but it is much more difficult to change the negative thinking that we have ingrained in our children's minds surrounding body image. What most parents aren't seeing, is that while they are trying to save their children's waistline, they are sacraficing their self-esteem. A child's mind is so impressionalbe and they can easily learn to put labels on food based upon the teaching of their parents. I think the best solution would be something that i would have appreciated growing up; cooking classes or classes in school that teach children about the wonderful ways to enjoy the vegetables that their parents always try to get them to eat! Giving children a sound background on where real food comes from, will help them to understand why their oreo cookies are not considered to be a "whole food." These are only my opinons and i am not a parent yet, so i cant say if any of this will work. I am eager to start working with children and nutrition so i can test my ideas. I am going to start this summer with creating a program about food for a pediatric cancer camp that i volunteer at each summer. I'm interested in creating my own way to reach kids about eating healthy, or more importantly forming positive relationships with food and their bodies. I suppose that i am still learning to do this as well, and I'm certainly not a child anymore. More than likely i am still trying to re-teach myself the unhealthy labels i have placed upon types of food, and let me tell you that it takes a while to undo!

Calling All Foodjags!

I first heard of the word, "foodjag," last fall, in one of my graduate nutrition classes. We were discussing how to raise children to be healthy eaters, which is a extremely hot topic in the field of nutrition. There are many opinions on how to do this, coming from nutritionists, physicians, psychologists, parents, and teachers. I am interested in it, because as a child, i had many foodjags, and most of them unhealthy. First of all, i should tell all you inquiring minds, exactly what a foodjag is. I was actually quite surprised that in my conversations with people this week, no one had heard of the word. Basically, a foodjag is an obsession with a particular food. Children who eat only one type of food over and over again, are said to be on a "foodjag." This behavior is noticeable in children, who tend to be picky eaters, but i have found foodjags to be occurring in adults as well. Just think of how many people around you are obsessed with a particular food or food group. Whether it be because it really is their favorite food and they can't stop eating it, or because they are on a diet and it is the only thing they can eat. We as a society also become obsessed with a food, once someone has made a statement about it's health benefits or ability to help us loose weight. If Oprah has a food item on her show and talks about its power to do such and such, you can better believe that people will be rushing to the stores to gobble it up. I find it fascinating how effective the power of suggestion can be, and not necessarily coming from any professional source. Our country has seen its share of foodjags, and theses are disguised as some of the most popular diets ever known. The Atkins diet had people obsessed with eating protein, while the low-fat diet made people fear anything that claim a low-fat label on the front of the package. The grapefruit diet was supposed to curb hunger, but I know some who will never touch another grapefruit after that diet. Many people can't even begin their day without a 16 oz double tall latte from Starbucks, and they start each day off with one. As you can see, we grow up, and many of our obsessions with food don't change. We have yet to learn how to balance out our diet and eat a variety, so that we can get the most nutrients and prevent boredom with food. I encourage you to think back to your own childhood. What food could you not get enough of? Most importantly, why did you choose the foods you ate all the time? For me, I was obsessed with McDonald's chicken nuggets dipped in sweet and sour sauce. I actually cant say if it was the nuggets, or the sauce, because i dipped anything in that sauce! I even remember my parents buying a large box or sweet and sour sauce from McDonald's so that we always had it on hand! Now as an adult, my obsessions with food are based off of what i learn in my graduate program, or what i read from health books or professionals. I think that while these are all good sources to get my nutrition education from, i tend to forget to listen to myself and my own human cravings. What does the food taste like in my mouth? Does the food satisfy my cravings? Is the smell appealing to my senses? Is the texture appealing? These questions and many more, should guide my food choices more than anything else. I am learning so much about how to think more about what i am eating and why. These questions may help me and others get to the bottom of our obsessions with food.